Gossip

So...I haven't been on recently because I have been away at a family wedding.  When I got back, I had to try to find the motivation to come back and write.  The motivation to get off my chest what has caused me problems sleeping.

The saying goes, "Don't judge lest ye be judged."  It's found in the Bible, and the only One with power to judge is our Heavenly Judge, God.  Why then, do we talk so much about other people?

Just now, I received a series of texts because I made a close friend frustrated.  Am I about to gossip to you?  No.  I learned my mistakes, and I promised this friend I would gossip no longer.  All in all, I hurt this friend because I talked to a couple of other friends about this friend, and word got back to him.  At least my friend has the guts to call me on it, so I can learn from my mistakes.

What have I learned over the course of this past weekend...Gossip is really wrong.  Positive as well as negative gossip...I thought I was only sharing news about other people I knew and loved and cared about.  Never realized it was gossip until I had a family member ask to not share information about them or their family.  That made me sit back and think.  Whose news is it to share?  Mine or that person's?  I have no right to share information, good or bad, about what is going on in that person's life.  They should be the one responsible for sharing news, good or bad.  I should not do that.

More of a wake up call was when my grandma called me about a "job offer" I had in another state, that I had before I moved here...it was a tenative placement and short term, 6 weeks.  No one reassured I was being considered until after I had moved.  Sigh...

I didn't tell my grandma, but my mom told her for me.  Then my grandma called asking why I didn't tell her...lol.  Oh what a tangled web we weave in life.  I have learned that the only one who should be talking about themselves is that person.  You shouldn't talk about anyone else.  Damage can be done, feelings can get hurt, people get alienated, friendships get ruined.

Another harsh lesson...if you listen to gossip, people assume you are contributing to it.  Therefore, you should ask the person to please stop once the gossip begins, so you are not privy or desiring to hear gossip.  The only way for gossip to stop is if everyone only shares information about themselves.  If you want to learn about someone else, ask that person, don't ask a friend or relative of theirs!  That way, nothing gets misconstrued or paints someone in a bad light.

This is all from a tired brain.  I haven't been sleeping well because of all the negative effects of gossip on my life.  Isn't that one reason I cited for stopping Facebook for Lent???

From now on, on this blog, I vow to focus only on myself.  I will not write about others, and I will not dare to judge another's actions as the only Being who can do that is God.  May you all learn a lesson from what I have said so as you do not have to learn the lesson the hard way, as I did.  You do not want to cry yourself to sleep for fear of losing a loved one due to gossip.  God Bless you all.

~CV